10 July 2006
The Art Of Being Completely Tackless
I got down to My Tern, a Bavaria 36 moored in Conwy marina, about 3pm on Friday afternoon. Which gave me time to unpack, put the electricity on and have a cup of coffee before the first of the crew was to arrive. Originally this trip was to coincide with the finish of the Clipper Race in Liverpool . But with the keel bolt problems suffered by the Clipper fleet, their arrival in Liverpool was delayed by a month. A new plan had to be hatched, having never been to the Isle of Man or Northern Ireland ; they had to be on the hit list.
The crew was to be Bob Leadbetter, Mike Johnson, Kate Spark, Mark & Teresa Emptage and myself. Although retired, Bob had to pull out the week before due to having to do some consultancy work for his former employer, which was a shame.
As with all meticulous planning, I had forgotten the shopping list, left on the kitchen table. Whilst having that first cup of coffee I tried to remember what we needed. Quite a task, as we needed provisions for a week. Whilst enjoying the warm weather, the first of the crew arrived Mark on his new motorbike. Once he had got the bike secured and had a cup of tea, we went to get the provisions. Not use to supermarkets, as Sarah does the shopping on the Internet, it took a while to find all that was required. After storing all the food and more importantly the wine, beer and whisky Mike arrived and before unpacking he went for a pint without inviting us. We soon got our own back as we went for one whilst he unpacked.
As chef de cuisine for the day I started to prepare the meal just before the girls arrived. It was to be a feast of pork chops, gravy, new potatoes and peas followed by apple pie and custard. I'm not sure who was more shocked by the amount of gear the girls had brought, especially Kate, Mr Plimsoll Line or me. After clearing away it was time to hit the sack as we had an early start.
My alarm clock sounded at three, bleary eyed I had a wash and put the kettle on. Mark and Kate both got up, as they were to be on the first watch with me, Mark being skipper for the day. After unhooking the shore power and getting the boat ready for sea, we slipped away from our berth at four. Although nearly an hour before dawn it was remarkable how light it was. We followed the channel out to the fairway buoy under motor. With a southeasterly wind of 10 knots we raised the sails and set a course for the Calf of Man. With a beautiful sunrise, the sea calm and a fair wind it was great to be back on the water. Teresa and Mike came on watch at eight just as the wind died, time to hoist the iron sail. Kate who was cook for the day did breakfast bacon and sausage baps. Mark had devised a scheme were we all had various tasks to complete, learning knots, flags, phonetic alphabet, acquiring a memento from a designated port, doing a specific task and finally asking a stranger to add captions to silly photographs. He duly handed them out after breakfast in sealed envelopes to much groaning.
Mike and Mark
A heat haze descended and we lost sight of land, eventually out of the haze the Isle of Man appeared. About three nautical miles away I spotted a fin in the water and called to the others, we changed course and slowed down and followed the fin. Another appeared, two thirty feet long basking sharks, one swam within three feet of our starboard side. It was an amazing sight, they are truly beautiful creatures, and if the trip had ended there I would have been happy. We saw two more as we headed up the east coast to Peel.
Teresa
Kate
Once we were off Peel castle I called up the harbour master on the VHF radio. We were asked to wait as there was a Viking long boat race taking place in the harbour. Following the last boat in, the wind picked up to twenty knots, the quayside packed with onlookers I made a complete hash of rafting up to another yacht, we had covered seventy-four miles. Once tied up, a quick change and straight to the quayside pub to watch England play Portugal , leaving the girls to prepare the evening meal. They joined us during the second half; once it got to penalties I knew we were out so I went outside unable to watch.
On a previous trip last year Mark had taken Roger's Tyrannosaurs a Viz comic publication. The rule was if you laughed out loud, you had to read it out. Mike read out the meaning of a G rope, a rather large ladies undergarment. We teased him all trip about his famous G rope. Unbeknown to Mike, Mark had written a called ‘Ode To A Rope' for Mike, the previous Wednesday the rest of us had met in secret at Mark and Teresa's to practice it. Back on board with quayside packed, Kate on spoons, Teresa on percussion, Mark on guitar and myself on mandolin (very badly I might add) we performed our little ditty duly wearing G ropes to Mike and a much perplexed audience. Clapping was heard from ashore but Mike was totally flummoxed as in his senility he had forgotten about it.
Kate did us proud with a wonderful Lancashire hot pot and copious amounts of red wine. After the meal I got everyone to stand and toast the team (should have been the Queen) one of Mark's tasks completed. Mike, Mark and myself went off to explore the delights of Peel, Teresa and Kate having more sense stayed on board. Being such great explorers we went to the next pub along the quay. It was heaving with several of the girls wearing plastic Viking helmets, due to Peel having a Viking festival that week. I knew that a Viking helmet had to be my souvenir. On asking a young lady where I could purchase the fore mentioned helmet, she promised that after the evening's entertainment she would give to me. Alas it was not to be, as I did not see her again. In the back room there was a band doing covers of punk songs, which we thoroughly enjoyed. After drinking enough to sink a battle ship, it was time to head back to our own vessel.
The next morning started off grey and with hangovers we went shopping for some more milk and sausages. I found the shop that sold the helmets but it was not open. We were not leaving till three pm , as we had to wait for the tide. We watched a Viking parade starting from Peel castle to the Viking village built on the beach. The ice cream shop that sold the helmets was finally open, success at last.
The sill was finally lowered and Mike who was skipper for the day took her out. We had a force three from the northeast and hoisted the sails and on a beam reach headed for Ardglass in Northern Ireland , a trip of fifty-five miles. As we entered the harbour a group of seals greeted us, basking on the rocks. It is a beautiful little marina and cheap, definitely going back there. By the time we had tied up and eaten it was eleven o'clock so no visits to the local hostelry.
Me doing work
The following morning after showers and breakfast Mark took her out, Kate was today's skipper or Mam as she was to be known. With a north northwesterly force three to four sails set we headed for our next port of call Malahide in Eire . On route we saw a pilot whale about thirty meters off our starboard side another fantastic sight. As the wind dropped we put the engine on, dropping the main sail I said to Mark keep tension on the halyard as it can get caught round the radar reflector, unfortunately he did not hear. I thought once in we could send Mark up the mast to sort it out, but he had other ideas. He hatched a cunning plan (I should have called him Baldric). Tying a half filled bottle of water to some fishing line, he threw the bottle at the cross trees, third time lucky. Tying the end of the line to the halyard and pulling on the bottle released the halyard, success; next problem was to get the fishing line down. With raising and lowering the halyard, the line finally came down.
We had been using the chart plotter and waypoints, which is certainly easier than the traditional way. An Irish navy patrol vessel past us on the starboard side and then called us up on the VHF. I knew we were just in a designated firing area, but these areas are not often used. Not today we were asked to proceed east for one mile till clearing and then south. I got the charts out and did some proper navigation, which was very enjoyable. We were not alone in transgressing, a few more yachts, some fishing boats and a ship that did not want to be diverted from his port of call. Listening in on channel seventy-two was quite entertaining. We could hear the firing from the shore and were glad for being out of their range. Teresa helmed whilst we went down the channel to Malahide, Kate tried calling up the marina on the VHF but to no avail, so she phoned. Mark took the helm to berth us we were tied up by half past seven and done sixty-five miles. After another fabulous meal we to a bar in Malahide for a couple pints of the black stuff.
Malahide Marina
The following morning Mike got up early to do some grocery shopping. After showers and yet another cooked breakfast, we sent Mark up the mast. He was to fit a latticework of fishing line between the stay and radar reflector, to stop the halyard getting caught again. Teresa and Kate both volunteered to go up the mast for the experience, which they really enjoyed. Mark and myself then had fun running the hull in the bosun's chair, just like flying around the fore stay on a cat without pitch poling.
We got the DART (train) into Dublin , I ended up sitting next to a very interesting chap who had also been to sea and was a keen sailor. Once off the train we headed for O'Connell Street , which is the main shopping street that crosses the river Liffy. We went for a coffee and cake at Sherrie's my cousin's café just off O'Connell Street , which was very nice. Unfortunately Adrian was having a day off, so I didn't get to see him, maybe next time. Next up was doing some shopping in the tourist shop, mainly T-shirts and junk.
Dublin Spire
River Liffy
A Church
We decided to do an open top bus tour of Dublin . They had headphones for the commentary, but my plug in station was knackered and they were the insert type that always falls out of my ears, so I sat back and enjoyed the ride. My son Matthew had done a lesson on Molly Malone a few weeks back s as we passed her statue I took a photograph for him. Just my luck the bus moved and all I got was a traffic light with Molly's head just above it. The trip was very interesting and Guinness factory is huge and dominates the south side of the Liffy.
Mark, Teresa & Kate
Mike
Molly Malone
As we were to eat out we decided to try a traditional Irish restaurant and duly booked a table before heading off for a swift one. We headed up to Grafton Street so I could get another picture of Molly, and get some more Euros. We were accosted by a couple of young people trying to get us to attend a comedy club. Time to get my caption sheet done, too quickly for the others, only Mark had completed this task and that was back in Peel, another point gained. We headed back to the restaurant for a wonderful meal; Kate managed to get her caption sheet done by a waiter. After the meal we got the Dart back to Malahide, and went for a drink in a local, we were all so full that it was a struggle to finish our drinks. So we wandered back to the boat for an early night, as we were to be leaving around eight in the morning.
Kate practicing her spoons
Teresa was today's skipper with no wind and a bright blue sky we head out of Malahide for the trip back across the Irish Sea . The water was flat as a pancake with a haze so visibility was only moderate. I took the helm but after a while I got a bit bored, so decided to swing the compass. This was something I had been meaning to do for a while, so with me shouting out the headings and Teresa noting them down I was all set to make a deviation card once home. A very useful exercise, which shows how far out the compass, can be. We drifted for half an hour for lunch that was very pleasant. Around three the wind picked up slightly so we set sail, the wind slowly died over the next couple of hours, so it was back to motor sailing. Mark asked if I had done any man overboard drills on My Tern, not till now was my reply. After explaining what would happen and who should do what and why, I tied two fenders together called him Bob and through him over. A bit like that famous knot spare lash, Mark was first up and did very well. Kate and Teresa who were both a bit nervous had no problems at all. As Mike was a bit more experienced I asked him to use the MOB on the chart plotter, explaining that it would give us a fix and a course back to Bob our man overboard. Mike motored past Bob and we pretended to throw the dan buoy, before Mike could set a course back to Bob I had spotted a porpoise one hundred meters away. Forgetting about Bob we went to watch the porpoise. It was only about ten minutes before we headed back to Bob, in the two-knot tidal stream he had drifted quite a way from the fix Mike had taken, but still in sight, cold and wet we hauled Bob back on board.
Lunch
We picked up a mooring in Holyhead harbour, tried contacting the sailing club on VHF to get the water taxi, but to no avail. Time for the dinghy I took Teresa and Kate ashore with no problems. After evening meal, which Mike had prepared, a chicken and Budweiser dish, which I thought, was fowl (the old ones are the best). We headed for a drink in the sailing club. Mark took Kate and Mike ashore and managed to get the painter wrapped around the propeller, once sorted he was on his way again. On the way back he ran out of fuel and Kate sails with him every week, she is either fool hardy or very brave! Teresa managed to get her captions done by some students. One of the other tasks Mark had set us was to find a co agent, but with everyone forgetting what to ask and the response to be given it was proving a quest too far. Only when back on board and having re-read the instructions did we find success.
Sunset at Holyhead
Another beautiful morning greeted us for our final leg of our journey. Holyhead to Conwy via Caernarfon bar and the Menai Straights, Mark was to be skipper for this last leg. On a falling tide we headed out of the harbour and headed for North and South Stacks, the tide was giving us a couple of extra knots over the ground so we were soon round South Stack and the water was flat. South Stack can be a swine at times to sail around with large overfalls, but today it was almost flat. We dropped the anchor about one at Pilot's cove on Llandwyn Isle, one of my favourite beaches in the world. After lunch Mark wanted to go swimming, so Kate, Mike and Mark rowed the dinghy ashore. As soon as they stepped ashore the wind picked up to twenty-three knots and the anchor started to drag, just as well Teresa and myself had stayed on board, we reset the anchor, which held and got the others to come back. It took Mark a while fighting against the wind and the incoming tide to reach us. We everyone safely back on board and the dinghy stowed, we raised the hook and headed for the bar. The sea was quite lumpy so we motored till we came into the Straights, then unfurled the genoa and gybed our way up the straights. I took the helm for the Swellies as I know them very well, the wind died to about three knots but we still had the tide pushing us on. To be on the safe side I switched on the engine, Nelson had said the this stretch of water was the most dangerous waters around the UK . We passed Menai and Beaumaris and headed across the Penman swatch, it was still a good five gusting six with the odd lull and lumpy seas. Back in Conwy we filled her up with diesel before going to our berth.
Mike went into Conwy for a chippy tea over which we added up our scores, Kate won with Teresa and Mark joint second, Me fourth and Mike fifth. Which is why I had to do the write-up. Mark was shift early in the morning so had to head off, the girls also headed off. The following morning Mike and myself cleaned the boat top to bottom and headed home about midday . Seeing as three of them got out of cleaning wait till they see the rota for the next trip, Mike and myself are to be waited on hand and foot. Next year's trip I hope to be down to the Scilly Isles and up to Cork .
I would like to thank the crew for all their help and being such great fun to sail with, their skills are coming on really well. I had such a fantastic time and such a laugh wonderful company. The funny thing about this trip after two hundred and eighty-two miles we never did one tack!
Mike Hilton
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